What is Studyism?
Studyism is the religion in which you have to study for 24 hours a day, while continuously praying to multiple gods. Studyism is a religion in which you have to worship the gods in order to get 100% and straight As.
A typical Studyist ritual. Note the strange vase-looking object with the candle inside. This is to please the many gods of Studyism by establishing a link with the real world and the spiritual world.
The 'Principels' of Studyism:
1. Thou shalt study every morning, lunchtime and evening until exhausted.
2. Thou shalt kill thineself if thine achieve below 80%.
3. Thou shalt complete all assessment tasks at least 3 weeks before they are due.
4. Thou shalt whip thineself if thine loseth a mark
5. Thou shalt not engage in humour, unless for marks.
6. Thou shalt not engage in sport, unless for marks.
7. Thou shalt make notes on every word of every teacher.
8. Thou shalt eat nothing but examination papers, unless for marks.
9. Thou shalt never come second, and repent it so by doing extension work through midnight.
10. Thou shalt befriend everyone and every teacher, especially for marks.
11. Thou shalt flirt with teachers, especially for marks.
12.Thou shalt ask for tissues from teachers, especially to develop intimate relationships - and marks.
13. Thou shalt make over-exaggerated facial expressions, especially for marks.
2. Thou shalt kill thineself if thine achieve below 80%.
3. Thou shalt complete all assessment tasks at least 3 weeks before they are due.
4. Thou shalt whip thineself if thine loseth a mark
5. Thou shalt not engage in humour, unless for marks.
6. Thou shalt not engage in sport, unless for marks.
7. Thou shalt make notes on every word of every teacher.
8. Thou shalt eat nothing but examination papers, unless for marks.
9. Thou shalt never come second, and repent it so by doing extension work through midnight.
10. Thou shalt befriend everyone and every teacher, especially for marks.
11. Thou shalt flirt with teachers, especially for marks.
12.Thou shalt ask for tissues from teachers, especially to develop intimate relationships - and marks.
13. Thou shalt make over-exaggerated facial expressions, especially for marks.
Hail Annika
Hail Annika, full of grace.
Education is with thee.
Blessed are you among studyists,
And blessed is the result of my test,
A++++.
Holy Annika, Mother of Grados,
Pray for us that fail in tests,
Now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
Education is with thee.
Blessed are you among studyists,
And blessed is the result of my test,
A++++.
Holy Annika, Mother of Grados,
Pray for us that fail in tests,
Now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
Our Mother
Our Mother,
Who is studying,
Hallowed be Thy name;
Thy kingdom come;
Thy will be done on home as it is in school.
Give us this day our daily work;
And forgive us our failed marks
As we forgive those who fail against us;
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil. Amen.
Who is studying,
Hallowed be Thy name;
Thy kingdom come;
Thy will be done on home as it is in school.
Give us this day our daily work;
And forgive us our failed marks
As we forgive those who fail against us;
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil. Amen.
Act of Education
O my Annika, I am heartfully sorry for having offended thee, and I detest all my failing grades because of Thy just punishment, but most of all because I have offended Annika, Who is all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to fail no more, and to avoid the near occasion of fail. Now please kill me. Amen.
List of Gods
Pencilis - Goddess of Study Notes
Portfolia - Goddess of Technology and Applied Studies
Assessos - God of Assessments
Assignis - God of Assignments
Grados - God of Marking and Grades
Annie - Queen and Mother of all Studyist Gods
Markisa - Goddess of Marking
Educatos - God of 100%
Detentos - God of Punishment
Kathka - Father of Studyist Gods
Libria - Goddess of Books
Ramma - God of Electronics and Sentral
Portfolia - Goddess of Technology and Applied Studies
Assessos - God of Assessments
Assignis - God of Assignments
Grados - God of Marking and Grades
Annie - Queen and Mother of all Studyist Gods
Markisa - Goddess of Marking
Educatos - God of 100%
Detentos - God of Punishment
Kathka - Father of Studyist Gods
Libria - Goddess of Books
Ramma - God of Electronics and Sentral